Have you ever had the opportunity of watching young children put together a puzzle? If the piece doesn’t fit immediately, they often push and shove to make it fit…with lots of grunting sound effects on the way :-)!
It’s kinda like how I used to live my life. I never felt like I “fit” in my family or anywhere else really (to be really honest).
My sensitive, inner-focused ways were not understood. So I forced myself to change the shape and color of my personality to get along and succeed with others. It worked in my family. It helped me succeed in the world of work too.
I became Ms. People-Pleaser, par excellence. Others were happy. I secretly felt like a fraud inside, like there was something wrong with me (for not fitting in).
Here’s a live video I broadcast on the subject…
Can you relate?
Fortunately, I privately kept my inner truth alive, between me and my higher power. This gave me the courage to leave the US and live in foreign lands where the dynamic was so different. I learned that there’s nothing wrong with the way I’m shaped mentally, emotionally, physically or spiritually.
There’s nothing wrong with other people’s shapes either. I learned that the only piece of the puzzle I can change, is my own. I have choices. Instead of spending time in situations where I don’t fit, I can look for ones where I do.
I’ve learned with my family that I can change what I can within myself, and stop trying to people-please which NEVER works and usually boomerangs, leaving everyone to feel ill at ease.
Does your piece of the puzzle fit?
Today, I aim to change myself from within, by surrendering old habits I learned to get along in the past yet in need of updating today. That was the impetus for creating the Stop Self-Sabotage Free 5-Day Challenge as a REALLY FUN way to move beyond the experience of procrastination and perfectionism connected with over people pleasing. When you do that, you end up pleasing yourself and this pleases others too. It’s a win-win!
Thanks so much for showing up for yourself. Your voice makes a difference! Feel free to pass this on to anyone who you think might benefit from it.
Are you struggling with perfectionism, people-pleasing or procrastination these days? If you’re a purpose driven professional, my friend Eliana Gilad is leading a productive and FUN “Stop Self Sabotage” FREE 5-Day Challenge: http://elianagilad.